My husband entered me in a contest to win tickets to a pre-screening of “Rock of Ages,” which was strange because he had no interest whatsoever in seeing it – which must mean he wanted me out of the house so he could play his new Rush CD over and over again at ear-splitting decibel levels, or “11” as he and Spinal Tap like to say.
I believe when I originally told him I wanted to see the movie he said, “That is every band and every song that I absolutely hate.” Go figure. I however, am quite fond of Night Ranger, Whitesnake, Bon Jovi AND Def Leppard, so when he told me I had actually WON two tickets I was PUMPED. Until I realized I needed to find someone to go with. But then I had a brilliant idea. Since Sandy lives too far away to play on a “school night,” I called… MAX!
So, our guest reviewer on 2fortheshow this week is the adorable, talented, creative, multi-faceted, Max.
On a side note, Max has a little trouble with his filter regarding what you should and shouldn’t say in public. We had been in the theater about 5 minutes when I realized the best part of the show was going to be him. As other contest winners and “regular people,” began strolling into the theater, I was treated to a running commentary on attire, nationality, cleanliness and personal appearance in general. While Max snarkily commented about buses, subtitles and Bosnia (don’t ask), I attempted to hum or cough to block the hearing of the gentleman directly to my right whom I felt wasn’t happy to be there in the first place and just MIGHT be happy to kick somebody’s butt. And I’m pretty sure Max is not a fighter.
And THEN, the movie promotions company did the unthinkable. They decided to host an air guitar contest. I think this was intended to up the energy in the auditorium prior to the movie viewing, which made me immediately suspicious. I typically enjoy movies WITHOUT needing a warm up act. So Max and I huddled in our seats trying to become invisible, which we successfully managed, as neither was chosen as an air guitarist.
Try to contain your disappointment.
They chose people based on whether they looked like 1980s roadies. If I had been selected it would have been the second worst insult of the week. The first being the comparison of myself with Carole the receptionist from the original Bob Newhart Show. But I digress.
For the next 15 minutes (or lifetime), however you prefer to see it, we watched 5 people be publicly humiliated, then rewarded with barely a smattering of applause. We should have just voted on which one we thought really HAD been a roadie. They were eventually given t-shirts with the name of Tom Cruise’s fake “Rock of Ages” band on it – Arsenal. Max predicts they will never see the light of day.
Everyone settled back into their seats, and they dimmed the lights to start the film…
To be continued on 2fortheShow, as soon as Max and I finish writing the review.
Now THAT’s a teaser.
Insert air guitar solo here. And take a look at the preview, if you haven’t seen it yet.
3 thoughts on “PRELUDE TO A REVIEW OF ROCK OF AGES”
That sounds very cringeworthy! Max, on the other hand, sounds like an undiscovered talent in other ways! Looking forward to the review.
Oh to have been a fly on the wall.
Oh, you of all people can imagine.